Sometimes an easy thing becomes so complicated that we forget it was something we wanted to do. Starting from square one then, is the only thing left to do.

BY indefiniteloop

A slow day, almost comes to an end. Last year, frankly, was a struggle with respect to writing everyday. Though, I did; not everything made it here.

And today, as the first month of this new year has wrapped up, I found myself down another rabbit hole of asking myself, why last year wasn’t that great a year as the year before that, where posting on this blog is concerned?

There are multitudes within the answer to that question. Some layers of it would be things like moving away from sojourner was a big transition, burnout with regard to some failed ventures was another, travel was one too, then came procrastination, followed by laziness that prompted another question on some occasions last year: what do I intend to do with this blog, something in which I have, and still put a lot of time, and effort in?

The above was followed up by finding ways to make this blog, and myself, self-sufficient over the course of this year, for the next five years at least. This search spiraled into another set of questions on trying to setup an online shop, alongside this blog. And, as I type this, the products that were supposed to go live sometime last year, still sit ready to be shipped under my desk. The delay for that can be attributed to the paperwork, and other requirements needed for setting an online shop that can cater to the world. Even so, I tried putting these products up on gospaces, which shut down last year, within a month of launching a page there, and writing about their services. This was promptly followed by setting up an online shop at instamojo; the page doesn’t see much traffic. I haven’t done much in terms of marketing it or advertising about it, because they would only cater to the Indian market. This has made me lose interest in following it up or setting up a store with them.

Once, I had the requirements noted to start selling online to an international market, I relegated myself to making sure those were met, and are being met.

Along with all of this, another layer of the first question I posted above, is that there are days when there’s no inspiration. This one thought keeps prompting me back to daily write. And, we’re working on it. And, it is slow going. Nothing immediate would present itself, other than me heading out to find inspiration somewhere, to write about.

As I was going through all of this today, I realized that this is a kind of derailment, and it’s what I call writing derailment. All of the above has derailed me from the simple act of writing every day. That’s what was different between last year, and the year previous to the last year.

And, I’ve to be careful not to let myself slide down the derailment hole this year. I do care about this blog, and the need to post daily. It’s a fix that I do not not want to feel.

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